A work of mastercraft of the most noble dimensions. A royal column!
Three months ago, Hawaiian surf royalty Nathan “Nasty” Florence and Koa Rothman went on a podcast hosted by comedian and the inspiration behind National Lampoon’s Van Wilder, Bert Kreischer, and threw arrows and barbs and whatever else was at hand at BeachGrit.
“Here’s my question, is surfing like comedy where the gossip is what would sell?”
Florence ponders for a moment before answering, “I don’t think it would. There are some platforms that do sell on gossip but I wouldn’t say they’re the biggest.”
Bert, curious, wonders, “You talking about BeachGrit?”
Florence, without pause, says, “Yes.”
Rothman, the handsomest of his brothers adds, “They suck, they suck.”
Bert, laughing, describes how the lovable surf tabloid pops into his feed. Florence tells him to “get it out of there.” Rothman interjects, “They’re not even big either. They talk shit about anyone.” At the same time Florence says, “They just make up stuff. They just straight make up stuff.”
Rothman ends with, “It’s crazy,” shaking his head.
All true of course and they might have added hysterical and petty for good measure.
On a recent North Shore morning, Kreischer, who is fifty, and the twenty-something Hawaiian Only Fans star and Powerlifter Nathan Florence, combined for a hot and heavy workout in the grounds of the Sunset Elementary School.
The “brutal field workout” contrasts the maddeningly cool Florence with the furnace-face greasy Kreischer, sweat already beginning to sluice down his face and body even before the calisthenics begin.
But what should be a comedy of fat man vs athlete becomes wildly erotic as the viewer is gifted what appears to be the outline of Kreischer’s forbidden curves, a work of mastercraft of the most noble dimensions. A royal column!
Or is Kreischer carrying another tool of some sort.
More questions etc.
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I don’t. Fill me in!
what a longwinded fucking explanation – just fucking get into it
bored by his descriptions and out
Oh, do tell the genesis of name.
At first glance I thought that was bradda Ash G packing the loggans
And he wears little yellow jimmy hats that just cover the tip
That was boring apart from Bert who is so cool that he didn’t even care that a python had crawled into his green shorts
The athletacism of professional surfers is an absolute joke. Not even going to touch the low hanging fruit of not finishing middle school. The rotten fruit is us commenting here most likely..
This story was definitely way—‘non-essential’…or needed..(you’re gonna give BG a bad rap here)..some thoughts are better kept to oneself……
Clearly you didn’t read the first 3/4ths of it. Or the poem.
That poem! Never fails to astonish.
I reckon 9 inches is impressive in whatever format.
I watched National Lampoons Christmas Vacation last night; it had held up remarkably well.
I wonder if the bigger ones often don’t hold up so well with age
And so does Elf! We should Christmas together.
Next year, I’ve already worked through most of my annual list.
Die Hard
Miracle on 34th street (new one)
Santa Clause
Elf
National Lampoons
Only Home Alone to go
Love Actually…? Great flick if you’ve not seen.
Too mainstream , man
Thems fighting words.
No Bad Santa?
I’ve never watched! I know I should
Hey Nate, give up the GoPro pov shit.
It sucks unless it’s perfect. That Irish one blew chunks.
Cheers, mate.
We Suck Less
Makes him sound like a special needs retard.
Simple Nate.
Hope you approve of gabby’s new look. He’s ready for the South of Market clubs in SF. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I will rely on your familiarity of the subculture
WSL owner Dirk Ziff’s close friend Harvey Weinstein is a top story in the today’s New York Times. Google their names for a Fortune magazine article with more on their relationship. Why no female commentators for last week’s “WSL sanctioned” Pipeline contest? The female sideline reporter did a great job. Laura Enever did a great job commentating the one heat where the commentators were supposedly interviewing her.
Hey Nate, you are going to need to have more comedians and less surfers if you want to try and make pulling plates down a field at a snails pace entertaining. Now go do that podcast I won’t listen to. Cheers, mate.
You’re straight making this up, right?
It’s Christmas, what else is there to do ‘kept have a lil elfish fun?