Fantasy-gate takes sinister turn as World Surf League corrects major calculation error under cover of darkness

"Screw the clowns that will never understand surfing and support the frothy core lords!"

Yesterday, both fans and casual observers of professional surfing were shocked to learn that the World Surf League had made a major calculation error as it relates to its much-ballyhooed Fantasy Surfer offering. Absolute pandemonium ensued with “irregularities in the scores posted on the WSL fantasy surfing app.” The commissioner of the Froth World Tour took it upon himself to find answers, seeing as money, surfboards, etc. hinged on getting the mathematics right. With a deep dive into the scores, the good sir found “there are points variances in the WSL Finals Overall Leaderboard and the individual Finals Event point totals.”

Disaster.

But on purpose? The World Surf League is known for a sadistic approach when concerning its most passionate, most loyal subjects. It might be imagined that various C-Suite executives sat back in the League’s new shared veterinarian offices deriving much pleasure from the cries of fans intermingling with the dying gasps of euthanized cats.

Well, per the norm at the “global home of surfing,” the problem was sorted under cover of darkness with no explanation offered as to how things went so wrong, leaving fantasy leagues in a real bind.

Reaching back out to the Froth Pro Tour commish for answers, it was shared, “They quietly made the update 24hrs later without acknowledging the major calculation error potentially making the most loyal fans with private leagues recall their final results and awards/payouts. As the most core of the core fan base it calls into question, can we trust the scores on the WSL platform? What would have happened if the super fans didn’t bring this to the WSLs attention? Would the scores ever have been updated?”

Furthermore, “As the commish for over a decade, in general the WSL does a poor job of catering to the super fans of fantasy surfing.

Lastly, “We are here to improve fantasy surfing for all. There is a huge opportunity for the WSL to engage with the core who tune in for the call every morning, and wake up in the middle of the night to edit our fantasy teams. As fantasy surf fans we would love to see warm up days, and early morning or after the event free surfs. The WSL is laser focused on attracting new audiences, and while know this is an important part to becoming a profitable business, we need them to invest the loyal base. The WSL has done a great job broadcasting from the remote corners on the globe and can do more for the frothiest fans.”

In other words, “Screw the clowns that will never understand surfing and support the frothy core lords!”

So there you have it.

Did you think, for a 24 moment, that you won your fantasy surf league only to have whatever pride/accolades ripped from your hand?

A walk of shame, no doubt.