Are surfers unable to receive love or is it just me?
I finally got done giggling about Samsung abandoning the World Surf League about four minutes ago. Whew! That was good… but now that I have regained a modicum of restraint I am left to wonder. Are we, surfers, self-destructive dickheads?
Let us rewind to March 2016. The World Surf League was about to embark on an exciting new season with world’s third largest company as title sponsor. Its CEO, Mr. Paul Speaker, had come in the year before after a successful (maybe) run as the director of marketing for the multi-billion dollar NFL.
Them skies don’t get much sunnier!
But was I content? No! Unless by “content” you mean “rude.”
Speaking for myself, I cajoled Herr CEO as much as I could (see here, here, here, here, etc.) and he ran away crying, taking all of his NFL experience with him.
I also regularly poked Samsung (see here, here, here, etc.) and while I don’t think BeachGrit is widely read in Korea, I’m sure the Samsung VP in charge of Samsung’s surf relationship saw some of the pieces simply because only three people write about professional surfing and two of them are here (I’m including Nick Carroll).
Which has left me to wonder?
Are we unable to accept love?
Is there any company that could come in and headline the Tour that I wouldn’t kick in shins? Any future CEO I wouldn’t fun make?
Are all surfers dickheads or is it just me?
Quaaaaaaaaack!!! I just moosed all you barneys!
After reading the comments here, just wondering if there is a 12 step program for self-identifying dickheads?
Would you kick redbull?
WTF?? You signed up for being a Bitch and now you’re questioning your job description. This is BitchGrit
I’m as cheesy as they come.
I was just in a discussion yesterday about the official founding of The Royal Order of Surf Journalists and you are going to be president. I hope you are ready.
Do we all get to wear capes?
Obvs.
And ceremonial swords. I insist upon it
Its now official.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I like to pretend I am not a dickhead in the surf, however smiling and saying gday underlies me trying to take the majority of waves I can, wishing anyone to fall on a wave if they inside me and take off, and generally being fucking surly as if any groups attempt to paddle out where I am sitting solo!!! But maybe they are all dickheads too – I am confused now!!!
We are total dickheads… I have a vivid memory of realizing this as a 22 year old dickhead after what would have been one of the best waves of 4 month Indonesian sojourn.
As I was bottom turning into a hefty picture perfect barrel, one of my best friends was paddling over the shoulder. Instead of hooting he blatantly looked the other way to avoid giving me any satisfaction in knowing someone witnessed it!! The dickhead!!
The fact that I was standing tall {as tall as a poo-stanced immediate dickhead surfer can} posing with my arms out and palms up like a dickhead wasn’t lost on me.
I’ve never posed on a wave like a dickhead show pony since.
But consciously deciding not to pose? total dickhead move! arggghhh…
Hah, a mere turning of the head. One of my mate hurt his knee and couldn’t surf so swam out with one of those disposable waterproof cameras. After pulling into a solid head high and a half wave, only because the camera was there mind, I saw my ‘mate’ holding the camera at arms length pointing at the beach. The bastard had made my pulling into a stupid close out pointless. As I came up with sand in at least 4 orifices, oh how we laughed.
I don’t think that at all. I think what really gets under our skin is being treated with arrogance and contempt by people who because they’ve got their hands on a shit load of other people’s money, think they own a chunk of something we feel actually really close to. It’s a really nasty thing, feeling dismissed from something you’ve spent a fair bit of your life engaged in. That was the footing the whole WSL project stepped off on, with me and with a lot of others, and while many of the crew who work on tour were and remain good friends of mine — basically people who got into it because they were stoked on surfing and felt they could contribute — it’s taken a very conscious effort on my part to get past that sudden and quite ugly sense of exclusion, and sorta re-commit to observing and writing about this ridiculous sport. If I’d been, say 24 years of age in 2014 and that shit had begun happening, I’d have turned completely feral.
Out of respect I wont call you a Dickhead publicly, I’ll just keep that thought to myself.
So the common theme here is the Wsl burnt it’s bridges and alienated itself from surfers by chasing non surfers.
Wsl really did become the new quikabong!
Well I think that has softened a bit over time and will soften a fair bit more, as the WSL more and more realises what the ASP at its best knew implicitly: that pro surfing needs surfers more than it needs non-surfers.
…and pro surfing needs those bottom feeding, oxygen theiving surf journalists more than it does Anderson Cooper
I dunno, is there any surf media left?
Like moths to a flame, they shall return!
the difference is that we’re just assholes in person… we don’t go writing gossip that hundreds (generous) will see
Don’t we?
He sorta just did, The dickhead… I’ve always thought you’re a dickhead to Jimmy.
I couldn’t identify as a surfer if I wasn’t!
it’s a mistake to think any two surfers think alike simply because they both surf.
Oh I totally disagree. I think surfing has rotted all our brains and we may not think exactly alike but we are more alike than we should be.
What are you holding in your hand in that photo? It looks like the back half of a dead rabbit??
how’d you even guess!
Dickhead.
We’re assholes. Rooting for the failure of others to make up for the lack of enjoyment or satisfaction in our own lives. Such is life.
Your right. It’s human nature to take pleasure in other people’s failings and failure, and this is probably amplified by being a surfer. How many great pointbreak waves have you surfed where the original rider fell or didn’t make a section!
Seeing someone fuck up at Swami’s on the peak and watching a perfect right go unridden to the inside bowl is dually satisfying to witness.
I think you really hit it on the head right here. Our extra-dickheadedness comes from this right here. Always pulling for the pointbreak failure. (unless we are the one up and riding)
thats not unique to surfing. it’s just people bickering over a limited resource. golfers hate to see other golfers show up on the tee behind them, i get super bummed when there’s another person fishing near my chosen spot.
But up and riding like a total dickhead…
Oh of course. And you know….. this comment just made me write another story. Coming right now!
http://beachgrit.com/2017/0…
Not only the rider falling but seeing a great wave come through and actively willing the rider to fall with all your brain power so you can enjoy it instead, no matter it be family, friend, foe…actually willing it more if its family or friend
You’re most definitely one of those Dickhead types…
Haha…we’re all Dickheads, its just that some of us haven’t realised it yet
Are assholes worse than dickheads, dickhead?
Dickheads and assholes are like pilsners and pale ales. Same effect yet different tastes.
At our core, I think that we are anti-establishment and tribal. Dora was the patron saint of the surfer as rebel and it seems that most surfers, myself included still retain and celebrate that quality.
“we are anti-establishment” – is that not a contradiction?
Crowd chants in unison “fuck you I won’t do what you tell me”
That’s actually hilarious, Dickhead.
Tribal dickheads are the worst, dickhead.
Can all you old bastards stop referencing your 1960s idol. Such a giveaway that you hold a senior citizens card. It’s 2017 for fucks sake! Nobody knows or gives a fuck about who dora is. Not relevant.
If you must, Dane is the relevant one who walked away from the corporate competitive mould, conflicted by it all and yet took the cash. Not saying he’s the first to do anything, just fuck off with Dora the explorer