Bethany Hamilton
The movie Unstoppable, which is out this summer, takes us on a wonderful voyage as Bethany Hamilton learns to fly.

Revisit: “What the one-armed fuck?”

How Maui shark bite girl Bethany Hamilton learned to fly… 

Roughly fourteen years ago, a little teenage girl called Bethany Hamilton had her arm bitten off by a tiger shark.

Read a dramatic account about that here. 

A decade later, as BeachGrit was being spat out of mammy’s womb, I got a ten-second clip sent to me via text from Bethany’s then-manager asking, “Is this any good?”

The clip showed Bethany landing a frontside air in Fiji.

Creed McTaggart, who was also privy to the clip, had fallen off a chair, yes literally, saying, “What the one-armed fuck!”

I was in the international airport at Los Angeles at the time and said that the exclusive on this clip would make our traffic soar, announce us to the world etc.

It didn’t.

As we quickly learned, it is far easier to repeat news than to create it. Seven hundred and sixty five views and zero comments.

Recently, the air resurfaced as the hero moment of Aaron Lieber’s film Unstoppable, “Bethany’s complete and untold story that follows her journey from childhood into motherhood – the ups, downs and her powerful resilience against all odds to become one of the leading professional surfers of all time. From chasing her toddler, to chasing the biggest waves, Bethany is continuously rewriting the rules on being a fearless athlete.”

It ain’t bad. Movie comes out sometime in the US summer.

Bethany Hamilton: Unstoppable Teaser - Air 360
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tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago

No one cast sin upon you at birth, but you were born with a sinful nature. If a baby dies he goes to Heaven because he never chose to ‘wilfully’ sin. But when you reach an age of accountability, of reasoning, and wilfully sin, choose the wrong path, the wrong actions, you separate yourself from God, and that is when you need to ask for forgiveness.

DTW
DTW
8 years ago

Maui girl? Com’on Reilly get your shite straight. KAUAI GIRL kook

SoCalGary
SoCalGary
8 years ago

Cant wait for Chris Cote to get his arms around this one (sorry, but Channelbottom made me do it) as this is a 180 at best with a revert. See BG story below. I think they call this a crossover in the TV and Radio world. 180 or 360, still a move that I can’t do.

CHRIS COTE: “ALBEE’S AIR IS A 360!”
https://beachgrit.com/2018/…

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
8 years ago
Reply to  SoCalGary

you’d think so, but apparently skaters call that a 360. They have a hard time with math though.

Pepe Landa
Pepe Landa
8 years ago

Kuai not Maui

f u
f u
8 years ago

Bethany is the toughest surfer I have ever shared the water with.

And that includes laird and a lot of other uber macho men.

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
8 years ago

There is nothing to forgive. Free love man. But, you will need to spell Jebus correctly.

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
8 years ago

Nup can’t see any compliments from this mob

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
8 years ago

Heal me Jebus!

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
8 years ago

Jebus forgives you but only if you buy 10 x magical power bands.

Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
8 years ago

In the near future, when rich folk start having limbs amputated and replaced with superior bionic ones, Bethany Hamilton will likely be world champion.

Or dead. Depending on how near the future is.

I mean, fuck, weren’t we all promised hoverboards by now? And by that I do mean real Michael J Parkinsons ones, not shitfuck fake exploding Chinese deathtraps that don’t actually hover.

Nat Youngs Requalification
Nat Youngs Requalification
8 years ago

Re;the guy preaching saviour:Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and drink his blood, whilst telepathically accepting him as your master, so he can remove an an evil “spirit” that is present in all humanity because some naked lady was convinced by a talking snake to eat a magic apple.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Fuck yeah dude. I want you as my pastor.

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Have you met Wiggs?

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  Eddie Haiku

I don’t think anyone here has in person, to their knowledge or admittance!

tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago

You already have a spirit, a soul, that’s going to live forever, the question is, will it be in Heaven or Hell? Jesus died on the cross so you could have a chance to ask for forgiveness and make it to Heaven.

merman
merman
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

Prove it

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Goddammit I love Latin binomials.

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago

If she had two arms, she’d probably be the best women surfer ever, for real.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Twillsy, is Glaceo kadindingdong another supernatural creature?

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

I googled it; it’s the tiger shark’s real name. Turns out Tiger Sharks are quite the hipsters.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  shootsthen

Well I think some of the Glackadinglewhatsits were aumakua, therefore supernatural.

Good work Batman. I was too tired to google it.

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

I only googled it bc Twillsy’s use of the word “Galeocerdo Cuvier” made me think it was was a fancy Brazilian underarm deodorant or a type of caviar.

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

But honestly, based on the 3 times I saw a bonafide tiger shark in the water, I definitely understand how they could be considered supernatural, at least not from my world.

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
8 years ago
Reply to  shootsthen

…whats google?

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago
Reply to  toofattosurf

It’s the answer to all of mankind’s questions. In the olden days, Google had various titles, such as “shaman,” “priest,” “father,” etc.

tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago

“All have sinned and fallen short”. Like I said, forgiveness is a free gift, but only in the name of Jesus.

astro
astro
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

K. Then he’ll do.
I don’t care – whoever comes thru with goods.
He’s free too, right ?

tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago
Reply to  astro

Forgiveness is a free gift,
if your sincere and ask to be forgiven in the name of Jesus.

astro
astro
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

Fuk mate – I believe.
We all do – born again, all of us.
Hey, can I combo my bets through you and add an odds on with budda and mohammed ? Coz that’d be good – save having to shop around.

Otto
Otto
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

I think these comments would thrive on Kook_Of_The_Day.

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

What about in the name of Baby Jebus? Does the Baby Jebus name have the same power as the Adult Jebus name?

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  shootsthen

He makes twenty poopy diapers from one.

astro
astro
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

And that’s a lotta shit wrapped up in one small swaddle !
His poor mother. Trying to empathise here.

astro
astro
8 years ago
Reply to  shootsthen

Aw fuk – him too !
Got a 3 way bet going here.
One of you bastards better show astro some love.

astro
astro
8 years ago

I’m def asking Jebus for the lottery.
I’m sincere, I’m a askn, hear me.
I’ve forgiven all those filthy fucken cunts who’ve transgressed agin me.
Really, I have.
I feel a song comin on …
“Oh, Lord wontcha buy me a Mercedes Benz …”

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
8 years ago
Reply to  astro

Praise Jebus!

tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago

Correction—Its ‘Jesus’ in your heart. Seems some of you guys at Beachgrit could use a a little forgiveness. Its free– but you have to be sincere, and ask for it.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

Jesus Fucking Christ I’m sick of you sky-fairy pesterers. Grow some brain cells.

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Thou shall not fault the brainwashed, for they know not that they’ve been brainwashed. For if they knew, they’d be sheep, and their world would tumble. Would be cool though if one day a powerful god came to earth and smited all the idiots. That’d be great, I’d pray to that dude: “hurry up already!”

tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Yes, Jesus Christ, he died on a cross for you, (channelbottom), and the world, so we could have a way to be forgiven of our sins, but you have to be sincere and ask to be forgiven.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

Hey Tommy! I’ve got the Bronze Age on the phone, they want their primitive belief systems back.

astro
astro
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

The only thing CB has to pray for is forgiveness for his Portuguese.
Its fucken atrocious and he shall be smote down with full vengeance for that.
Hallelujah!

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  astro

o filho mítico que está cheio de buracos tem muita porra de explicar para fazer para todos os seus seguidores bestas.

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
8 years ago
Reply to  tomsuess

why’d he make it so complicated? I mean, couldn’t the creator of the world have just saved the hassle and come down as a giant talking Llama or something? If I’m god, I don’t think i’d choose to implant myself in a virgin, walk the earth for 20 years and then get nailed to a cross just so the people I created would worship me and ask for forgiveness for sins that I cast upon them at birth without them doing anything wrong themselves. In truth, god sounds like a huge dick.

tomsuess
tomsuess
8 years ago
Reply to  Trogan Fan

No one cast sin upon you at birth, but you were born with a sinful nature. If a baby dies he goes to Heaven because he never chose to willfully sin, but when you reach an age of reasoning, of accountability,
and willfully choose to do the wrong thing, you separate yourself from God, and that’s when you need to ask for forgiveness.

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

I want to learn to do an air too, does Beth coach?

f u
f u
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

she’s likes the tube and doing airs and she is a tough as a person could be.
it would be difficult to find a more inspiring person.

resumes.mvlhawaii@gmail.com
8 years ago

Wow, I thought tunnels was on kauai and I live here!! What the fuck?

f u
f u
8 years ago

less publicity the better, right? let them think Maui

resumes.mvlhawaii@gmail.com
8 years ago
Reply to  f u

Good point!!! Thought I was struggling to understand an inside joke or something!

f u
f u
8 years ago

im prettty sure he is joking. her story is pretty famous everywhere

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
8 years ago

Does she know she’s from Maui?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
8 years ago
Reply to  Trogan Fan

She do now! It’s close to Kauai, yes?

velobwoy
velobwoy
8 years ago

Maui, Kauai, what the hell’s the diff?

Seas Nail
Seas Nail
8 years ago
Reply to  velobwoy

About 150,000 trustafarians

velobwoy
velobwoy
8 years ago
Reply to  Seas Nail

Kaui

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
8 years ago
Reply to  velobwoy

a chunk of sea…


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