"He is insane, everything is done for surfing is next level."
Now that Kelly Slater has pretend retired, all-comers are flooding, praising the greatest surfer of all time for his years of servitude. But a heretofore unforeseen question has suddenly arisen. Is there actually a greater-est surfer? Oh but we must turn our eyes south, to the proud nation of Brazil where impoverished* Americans and Australians are no longer welcome.** Chris Cote, Devon Howard, Jack Freestone, Adriano De Souza…
…wait.
Adriano de Souza?
Though who could forget eight years ago when Kelly Slater unleashed his wave tank hours after De Souza won his gorgeous, and hard fought, first and only Occy-esque surf championship?
Not me.
Champagne not yet dry on Mineirinho’s hair, Slater showed his Kelly barrel in Lemoore, California on Instagram and then proceeded to make this face.
The entire world following that gaze toward the cow stink, away from the new champ.
Or, years before when Slater and De Souza had an in-surf interaction in which the former “likens Adriano’s intemperance to a chemical imbalance due to his “passion.”
The most ancient of blood feuds.
It should be assumed, then, that De Souza harbors injustice like Indigo Montoya. Counting the days until vengeance is his.
That, friends, would make an ass out of you and me.
The boy from São Paulo, hours ago, took to Freestone’s sonnet and wrote, “i don’t know how to say to him, this is your last or not and yes 🤨 probably we don’t know tomorrow and what we can say is today right @jackfreestone he is insane, everything is done for surfing is next level 👏 @kellyslater”
Very polite dig at the start chased with a crystalline good nature.
Gorgeous and what a jolly good fellow.
Though, what do you think De Souza meant by “insane?”
More as the story develops.
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Adriano is the real winner, floating his through life
Classy
Adriano chose
The wrong word, he really meant
Disparatado
Disparatado, you know you ain’t gettin’ no younger
Your pain and your hunger, drivin’ you home
And freedom, oh freedom
Well, that’s just some people talkin’
Your prison is walking
Through this world all alone
Yeah De Souza really owes it to Channel Islands for “gifting” him Slater’s top-secret winning dimensions during his title year. The main reason Ke11y walked away I believe.
De Sousa, Slater, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc,
it’s all superficial and superfluous.
All dust in the wind.
The waves were here long before they were, and the waves will be here long after they’re gone.
A guy on here once stated that the waves are Free…any relations?
TANSTAAFW?
Amazingly how Adriano writes English is exactly how he sounds speaking it.
It is interesting.
My father butchered the language in writing much differently from how he butchered it while speaking. He spoke East Coast Canadian with a thick Austrian accent, in SoCal, and was also dyslexic. No shit.
Fortunately for him, he was good at math and engineering. 🤣
Kelly can count all his world titles on both hands. He can do this because he’s the six fingered man.